Long and emotional

Today was a soda and candy bar type of day. I had forgotten to make the cheesecake for the strawberries I needed to make the night before, so I had to make the cheesecake so it would be set up when I needed it. We had to leave the house early to go to Walmart to get Skylar sharpies to fix the picture frames she made for her friends. Half way there she tells me she forgot the pictures for the frames at home. So I have to turn around and get the pictures, go to Walmart and make it to school before the bell. I then head to Fresh and Easy to get strawberries because Walmart won't add match them. They don't open until 8:00. Now I have to wait 15 minutes for them to open. I then came home to the front door wide open. I had to start laundry in case one of Jake's brother's was going to take it that afternoon. I got the strawberries done, but couldn't put them on the platter because the platter didn't fit in the fridge. Brad came over and wanted to shrink wrap the t.v.s and couch. I made him leave 1 t.v. for the kids (and my sanity). Got the girls from school and they were so so so sad. This then made me sad and heavy hearted. Got home and had little time to pack up 2 more boxes, clear a filing cabinet, take out 2 loads of trash, get the 2 little girls showered and myself showered and ready to go. Of coarse we were late. Then even more worse news..... Bob couldn't find ALL my recipes. He says they are gone. I had over 40 pages of recipes. Again a heavy heart. I asked Shelby to get Maddie buckled in. I didn't realize she hadn't done it until I was half way home. so in anger and frustration, I YELL at her. I get Brayden from his friend's house and can tell he is hurting. I break down and cry because my heart hurts so much for him. I just can't hold it in any longer. I wish I could take away his pain. I wish he didn't have to feel so sad. It make me so sad that he is sad. I get home and Brad shrink wrapped the last t.v. and now my kids have nothing to do for the rest of the evening. Brayden begins to cry because he is thinking about all the fun and memories he has with his friends. If only I could take away his sadness. To end the night a LARGE bottle of laundry detergent only used for 2 loads fell to the ground and spilled all but maybe 5 loads. I am ready to turn the towel in. I just want this to all be over. I am so sad to leave good neighbors. I am sad that my kids are sad. I am sad to not have a moment to myself to soak everything in, accept it and KNOW everything WILL be okay. I'm sad that I won't get a moment to myself until we are settled in to wherever we are going. All I need is an hour to myself.

Happy notes for today: Our neighbors on the end of the street brought us a chocolate ice cream cake and a card. Very sweet and unexpected. We now know Jake will have a job in either Utah, New York or Texas. We should know within 2 weeks. I just have to remember to have faith that things WILL get better. I'm tired, emotionally, physically and mentally exhausted. I'm going to curl up with my sweet baby girl and TRY to get some restless sleep. We shall see.